Saturday, July 18, 2009

On this Episode of The Waiting Game!...

More waiting!! Woooooooo... lol.

I was so excited about this summer. It was going to be my very last one, as I'll be a working stiff soon enough. I was going to take a bunch of time off. I was going to relax. I was going to have a social life, and go out with friends, and sip drinks on a patio, and work out every day, and eat better, and sleep better. I was going to start to live a balanced life again and do all the things that I've been putting on the back burner in the name of achieving my goals and it was going to be glorious!! Now it's the middle of July and it doesn't feel like glory. It feels like waiting. It feels like I'm killing time... and I think that that is one of the most terrible things I've ever admitted.

I think part of it is that I've been so future focused for so long that I'm having a hard time just being in the here and now. Plus, I'm just so excited about moving and starting my new program, meeting my classmates and beginning this journey that it's hard to just enjoy myself. The next chapter of my life seems so much better than the one I'm in right now! I want to read ahead. Basically, it's a classic case of "the grass is always greener" someplace else. *sigh*
Why do I do this to myself?

So, I am waiting... but I am also trying to learn how to be in the now. I'm setting goals for other areas of my life and I'm learning about myself in the process. This may not be the way I thought my summer would go, but perhaps it's exactly what I need.


  1. I suggest watching 'Rory O'Shea Was Here' starring James McAvoy, a great movie that highlights the struggles of living independently with a disability. Summer entertainment that also relates to OT!

  2. I know exactly what you mean....
    I'm too future oriented too but my waiting is mixed with so much anxiety, anxiety for the moving out and the on year ind. design stint I will have if I make it into the MsC of OT program, etc.


  3. I am so in your boat...always looking to the next thing and not enjoying the NOW. Thanks for being such a sweet blog friend!!